Oh yeah? Go ahead, make my day!

That's basically what I was told by a lady I was idiotic enough to challenge the other day.

Nope, not a queue- jumper, obnoxious neighbour or dentist.
Far, far more scary than that. And she's got starfish, people. Starfish.

Wanna find out what's going on and why my local DIY haunts are boarding up their windows? Come back on Monday and be afraid. Be very afraid.

There will be hot glue, spray paint and, if I am informed correctly, a gauntlet thrown...